V. A Deeper Healing
1. Is it possible to recreate life?
If everything humanly possible has been tried and failed, why not try God’s ways?
The Bible tells us that the old life is
corrupted, and can not enter the kingdom of God. We have to accept
God’s salvation and receive life from God. Bible calls it “being born
again”. “Born again” means to receive life for the second time; this is
a new life in which our souls are renewed, not our physical bodies.
This new life is born through the Holy
Spirit’s sowing in a person’s soul; when that seed is nurtured and
matured, this person becomes new. This person does not belong to man
anymore, but to God. He is called the son of God. Just as Paul has
written, “I no longer live, but Christ lives in me.” (Luke 2:20)
“Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new
creation; the old has gone, the new has come!” (2 Cor 5:17) Though our
bodies are still old, our spirits are renewed.
If a person accepts this new life, all the
problems mentioned earlier will be solved. Whether you are an orphan or
not, the live you’ve lived before is corrupt, and can not enter the
kingdom of God.
Now that you’ve received a new life, orphan or
not, you are the same as everyone else; there is no difference.
Everyone is completely equal. No matter how much misery the old life
has brought you before, compared to the new life, it’s not even worth
mentioning. This completely heals all the symptoms of an orphan. This
is a new life in Christ, which is filled with joy, peace and hope.
Christ is the Lord of the past, present and
future. He is omnipotent, able to keep the believers to the end; He
will never forsake them to be orphans.
What’s more, God’s love is perfect and
unconditional, far superior to biological parents’ love. Once we
receive love like this, we won’t care about the shortcomings of our
parents. A person can build a new life in Christ, allowing this
God-like life to grow day by day until maturity.
One will no longer complain about the past fate, but be thankful for the new life he’s gained.
All the negative emotions of the past are swept clean, as if they are dead.
What comes out of such person’s heart today is
bright and sunny, full of hope. A new life is shown in front of
him/her. He/she has the power from above; everything is changed.
The arguments listed above are not just
theological theories; this is my belief and my testimony. This
salvation is branded on me. I believe all who receive this salvation
like I did, will experience the same transformation. I have given my
life for my faith. Since 1952 I have worked tirelessly toward this
goal. It’s been fifty-three years.
In my old age, God brought me to Liu Kwei to
face a group of children who have lost the warmth of their families.
The only thing I can do is to tell them about the gospel. Once they
have received God’s life, they can be further cultivated and nurtured.
Otherwise my mission would’ve been in vain. The
orphanage was founded by a Christian pastor; everything was modeled
after churches. The children were taught the Bible. But they are still
young, lacking the ability to understand. Whether they are truly saved,
no one knows.
At the start of the choir, I assumed that they
were all born-again Christians, otherwise they would not qualify to
preach the gospel or share their testimonies. But during the first
tour, it seemed like the words of the songs they sang did not touch
their hearts at all. I was taken aback. Could it be that they only
proclaim to be Christians, yet having never experienced the
transformation to a New Life? Is that why they do not feel anything for
these profoundly moving and meaningful songs?
Are these experiences of transformation not
detectable or traceable? Of course not. If it is so, then we could
never know for sure if we are saved or not. God
saves each person in a different way, but everyone who is saved can be
assured of his salvation. How does one know? There has to be evidences.
I deeply believe that when the children were
singing Those Unseen Hands in Mei-Lan Church and were struck by the
Holy Spirit, their hearts were branded by the Holy Spirit, and they
made the connection with God in the depth of their souls. They were
touched by God. God’s power shook their souls like a bolt of
electricity. They are sure of God’s existence, and God is dwelling in
the deepest part of their souls. They clearly experienced salvation,
which is necessary for them to possess the qualification and power to
preach the gospel.
“And you also were included in Christ when you
heard the word of truth, the gospel of your salvation. Having believed,
you were marked in him with a seal, the promised Holy Spirit, who is a
deposit guaranteeing our inheritance.” (Ephesians 1: 13,14)
When the Holy Spirit descended upon them the
first time, how many of them have truly experienced the renewal in
spirit? I didn’t ask, because this is between one’s self and God. But I
am sure that it will happen again and again. If a person did not
experience it the first time, he may experience it the next time or the
time after that. He will experience it eventually. I had an instinctual
feeling about this. Just as I expected, from then on, every time the
choir sang this song, the Holy Spirit worked among them so much so that
they were moved beyond themselves. This effect spread from the stage to
the audience like a fire that everyone was touched. The message of this
song (the sacrificial love of Christ) became more real and powerful.
Countless people experienced God’s touching that reaffirmed their faith
and recharged their strength. The magnificent power of such soul-moving
force can never be forgotten. It is forever imprinted in one’s heart
like a seal. It is as the Bible has said, “the seal of the Spirit.”
This “Imprinting Effect” was discovered by
psychologists. When the ducklings were first hatched, whoever they saw
at first sight will be the mother in their eyes, and they will follow
it from then on. This belief is termed [Imprinting Effect]. Because
that first experience is so deep and important, it can never be
forgotten.
In the same way, a Christian’s first
experience with the Holy Spirit can be equally fierce that it is
forever imprinted in his heart, with the hope of dwelling in it forever
and enjoying the soul-deep, profound sweetness repeatedly. This is why
everywhere we go, the audiences look forward to experiencing this
song’s soul-renewing power again.
This song has traveled with the Children’s
Home Choir to churches of different countries. Many choirs sing this
song as well, but they can never achieve the same effect as the
Children’s Home Choir could. It is because we sing with our lives, our
experiences; the emotions that flow through us are real, not acted out.
Every time this song is sung, we re-experience it just like the first
time. Through the song, the power of the Holy Spirit swept through
everyone’s hearts like the raging sea. However, the experience
associated with this song belongs to the Children’s Choir alone. When
the other choirs sing it, it lacks the same power because they don’t
have the same experiences to support it.
All the members in choir were renewed in life that their whole lives were changed.
2. Dramatic transformation
A little over a year after the choir started,
Mr. Chun-I Chuan, the Director of Academics, told me: “This is
amazing! The children in choir have visibly changed. Even those
who once were unruly and defiant are now much gentler. Who would
have thought that music can have such power of reformation?”
More good news: “Not only are children in
choir more obedient, they are more studious and seemed smarter.”
“I used to dread getting calls from
schools because they meant that I needed to clean up after the mess the
children have made.” The children from the Home are famous in schools
for causing troubles. “Nowadays I get calls of good news, such as
someone made the Honor Roll, or someone won a competition or award and
brought honor to the school.” Mr. Chuan exclaimed excitedly:
“Almost all of them are choir members.”
Initially during my stays, we rehearsed every
weeknight, weekends and holidays out of necessity. Would this
affect choir members’ school work and grades? The staff at the
Home held two differing opinions. Some felt that the choir training
should take priority, and be given enough rehearsal time. Director
Chuan, who is in charge of children’s schedules and school work, had to
take the whole picture into consideration. He suggested reducing
rehearsals from 2 hours to 1.5 hours and canceling rehearsals during
exams.
I am merely a guest at the Home, free
to come and go; I do not get involved in internal administration, nor
participate in any decision-making. I abide by what they decide,
although I prefer as much practice as possible. Because we need
many new songs each year on tour, there can never be enough rehearsals,
and every minute counted. Even when on tour, we needed to
rehearse during the day. However, I truly hoped that the daily
rehearsals did not interfere with their study time.
Over time it was evident that even though choir members spent
many hours rehearsing, their grades didn’t suffer; on the contrary,
they improved significantly. It was a huge relief for the staff.
“Those who take music lessons will
steer clear of trouble.” is a commercial slogan that seemed to have
been proven.
The “Mozart effect” is a hot topic
among psychologists. It too seemed to have been proven as fact.
Although I also believe in these theories, I
question whether music alone can account for the dramatic changes in
the Children’s Home Choir members. There are similar programs at
other homes, some with excellent orchestras, yet we’ve not heard any
miraculous transformation happening there as it’d happened here. I
believe there is a bigger factor than music - being born again in
Christ! This change expands through every aspect of a person’s
life. Not only did his grades improve but his characters, morals,
values and attitude all changed as well. There are
many good professional choirs in the world, but not one can change
people’s lives or touch their souls with their singing alone. I
believe that the impact of religious believes far exceed that of
music. To the Children’s Home Choir, music is a tool, the
equipment, not the essence of life. Music comes from without, but
inspiration comes from within. There is a big difference;
however, not many realize this. The miraculous
happenings of the Children’s Home Choir spread through the community,
especially among the other orphanages. Many wanted to witness it
with their own eyes, so they visited and listened to our choir
sing. They wanted to know how these abandoned children, who were
once in trouble, became an internationally renowned choir over night.
Who is this Mr. Kou, and what secret weapon did he use to make this
choir? However, since most of the time I am
stationed in the United States, many of these performances were
conducted by a choir member, or not conducted at all. Even my assistant
conductor was selected from the choir members. Many visitors regret not
having seen me personally.
Over time the reputation of the choir grew, as
well as the curiosity of the public. Finally it reached the
Children’s Bureau Ministry of Interior which organized an educational
forum for the administrators of almost all orphanages in the
country. They gathered in Liu-Kwei Children’s Home to study and
observe the various programs and systems, and to understand how this
“national treasure” choir came about. Through the choir’s
outstanding performance, its members and all the other children in the
orphanage were changed for the better.
In this forum, Mr. Chuan held a keynote speech
on the impact of music education and caught the interest and attention
of many orphanages.
I was not in Taiwan at the time to be a part
of it, nor did I have the opportunity to read his paper, so I do not
know the details. But according to what the staff told me, the
conclusion they’ve reached was that all the wonderful changes was
attributed to music education.
In 2003, the orphanage went through the first
annual nation-wide orphanage inspection. This was conducted by
the Children’s Bureau Ministry of Interior. Each registered
orphanage went through strict and thorough on-site inspection and was
judged by a committee of educational experts. All orphanages were
extremely nervous, as if facing great enemies, because the ratings that
came out of the inspection can affect the organization’s reputation in
the community, and therefore affect its future survival, as most of the
forty-some organizations are privately funded and rely on private
donations for financial support.
The Home staff prepared for this
inspection for an entire year, working tirelessly to ensure that they
covered every detail. This was a matter of life and death;
nothing can be overlooked!
I was there on the day of inspection, and the
choir gave a 30-minute performance as part of the inspection. The
Director of the Children’s Bureau Ministry opened her speech with this,
“It is our honor to have heard the performance conducted by the maestro
himself, Rev. Kou, …..”. I was never there when she heard the choir
before. This was the first time I heard the title “maestro” bestowed on
me. I was especially struck by this compliment because it came
from the highest official in charge of Children’s Bureau
Ministry. I felt undeserving of the title. I am merely a
music lover, not a musician. I am not professionally trained and
have not worked as a musician in my life. When other musicians,
after hearing the choir, called me a “great musician”, I replied,” I am
not a musician and I do not qualify as a musician”. But he
replied, “if you are not a musician, then who is?” Because of the
accomplishment of the choir, I was recognized as a musician; however, I
know how limited I am. One thing I know: it was God’s power that
took what little talents we have, and manifested them to the
extreme. The reasons for the choir’s success are not my vast
musical knowledge or professional experience, but the result of my
dogged determination, faith, and patience. In essence, I am
merely a spiritual doer, who incidentally opened a door to the music
world and established a small place in it. May all the glory be
unto God. Without God’s grace, there would not be a Liu-kwei
Children’s Choir. When people attribute our successes to music
education, I say: “The greatest glory to God as it should.”
God molded the soul person (a name used to
describe me by the Home administrator) and gave him the ability to
create this choir. He turned useless clay into a useful vessel. The
kind of work one does depends on the kind of person one is.
In the same sense, whether the choir can
become a national treasure and a useful vessel for God depended on the
nature of its members. If they were their old, corrupted selves,
could they have accomplished what they did? Without being saved,
can they preach God’s salvation to others?
Pastor Lin, the chairman of CCCOWE-USA and
organizer of the choir’s North America Tour, visited the orphanage for
a week to observe the rehearsals. He commented: “The
training the choir received is more than singing; it is the training of
a whole person”. This is quite true. My goal is not to train
singers, but to train servants of God. This is what makes us different
from other choirs. The reason our singing touched people’s hearts is
not because of good singing skills, but the unpretentious communication
of our true-life emotions. People may
ask: “You are not a counselor in the orphanage, but a music teacher.
Outside of singing, how can you influence their life internally?”
3. A Natural Growth
I never intentionally preach to them as a
pastor in class (except on Sundays when I was invited to preach.)
I live out my faith naturally. The best sermons are living testimonies,
not clever speeches. I believe that the character of a Christian is the
most powerful language. Everything he does is a silent speech. Live
what you preach. This is similar to how parents influence their
children’s characters through examples, not speeches. They see
everything you do.
Of course I try to educate them when the
opportunity arises. I talk to them when they go astray.
When they show progress, I encourage them, as would any father who
cared about the growth of his children.
Although I am only their music teacher, the
amount of time we spent together may exceed what they spend with other
teachers or counselors. From their testimonies we know that the
greatest influence in their lives is the choir. The choir conductor,
who took them all over the world, has a lot to do with what they have
become today. We shared successes, failures, honors and scorns in our
lives together. For 7 years we have shared the good and the bad
in our lives; the mutual understanding, trust and bond developed can
not be described in words. Inevitably, slowly and gradually we
became closer and more alike to each other.
More importantly I reminded them
often not to look up to any one particular person because no one is
perfect. We need to look up to God in heaven who is the perfect
example for us. As a routine, the choir starts each day with
daily devotions of Bible reading and prayers to help them develop
healthy and whole Christian characters.
The physical effect of crystallization is a
good example. Drops of water with minute mineral content in a
cave over time would form a huge column of Stalactites. Slowly
but surely, a mentor’s language and behavior will crystallize in the
heart of the mentored, becoming a part of his/her character. This
undetectable formation is more evident as time goes on.
People commented that the choir sounded like a
single singer. More aptly, they all sounded like the teacher,
because I would demonstrate first, and then explain the method; they
are correct only when they sound like me. The end result is that every
choir member sounded like me. After a time, with daily practice, their
voices crystallized into what I wanted them to be.
To say they are good or not is actually commenting
on whether the teacher is good or not, because how they sing is how the
teacher wanted them to sing.
This crystallization in music is also true in the
other facets of life. Through it, everyone grew and matured day by day.
Converse, if one lives among people of corrupt characters, one becomes just the same over time.
Substitution is another phenomenon. I used to
live in the country, with a nice rice field right outside the
door. When the farmer fell ill, the rice field was neglected for
a year and became a weed field. In the same say, because they did
not receive the nurturing and cultivation from of their mothers, the
orphans were like the neglected field, full of weeds, which are
negative thoughts and personalities. But now? Since they joined
the choir, their lives were renewed. They received the nurturing
and cultivation with God’s love, and their field is now green, full of
crops, which are positive thoughts and personalities. There is no
more room for the weeds..
Initially they lacked self-confidence; now that they
are in choir and have received positive affirmation from the audiences,
they became more self-affirmed. This in turn lead to even louder
and longer applauses. They realized that if they worked hard, they
could get better. “I am not bad; I am good at something. I can be
successful.” Gradually, it crystallized into a strong
faith. The positive personality chased away the self doubt and
negativity. Because they are in choir and received praises and positive
confirmation from all sides, from timidity and shame was born courage,
enthusiasm and optimism.
What was once weak and useless, a failure, is now
able to sing extremely difficult choral pieces. When the song was over,
the applause was thunderous; their news and pictures were in the
papers, the news programs and radio broadcasts. “How did I do it? Was
it all a dream? No! This is real. I have great potential; with hard
work, I achieve any thing.” Gradually the column grew bigger and
longer. “I am no longer useless. I am renewed, a new person.”
For 7 years, we kept growing and achieving higher
standards. As our reputation grew, more opportunities came our
way and our faith was strengthened. Each choir member matured and is
totally different from before.
A person placed in the sheep pans of God, being
shepherds and nurtured by God, will grow naturally. It is just as Paul
had said: “I planted, Apollo watered, only God makes one grow.”
(1 Cor. 3:6).
If the choir is a field planted by God, how could it not grow?
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